Here's the first chapter in a story I revised and have been working on. I'll post more chapters soon, but first I want some feedback, how good/bad it its, what you don't like, what needs improvement, and overall constructive criticism.
Look here for new chapter links.
Chapters
Chapter 1: Project Eccles, the Well Oiled Machine
An introduction to the main characters and what they do for a living.
Chapter 2: A History LessonA little bit of history of the world the story is based in and key plot development.
